Time

Time is a thief. It is a giver. It limits and breaks limits, creates and destroys.

Time is horrible; it is wretched. It is a thief, stealing away those we love and cherish, things we have always cared for, and taking away the life that is so short. My little cousin's greatest enemy is time. If she was old enough to truly know what time is doing to her, she would be afraid of time. Every day she grows a little closer to what could be her end, never knowing how long she may have. The cancer growing inside her since the age of two makes every second that goes by into a year’s worth of my time.

And yet, time gives more than anything else. For my cousin, it gives her more appreciation for what she has, and affects me in the same way. It heals her when she has a cold as only time can do. It lets her keep what she loves closer to her than anyone else will ever have the chance.

Time creates limits. It keeps us from doing everything we want to do, because there is simply not enough time. I cannot concentrate on my education while training in multiple sports and perfecting my skill in art and music. I run out of time to do it all. It limits the amount of money that is made in a day, a year, an entire lifetime. Thus, it limits what can be provided for families and the people around us.

Somehow, time also breaks limits. By keeping us from doing everything, it forces us to choose the most important things in our lives. Because we choose, it makes us better at what we have chosen, and breaks the limits and expectations we had for ourselves. It also breaks the limits on what society expects of a person. When time is limited, sometimes the impossible becomes reality for those who are desperate. There are stories of people who, in the most limiting situations suddenly accomplish feats that are not humanly possible.

Time is many things, but it is never something to be forgotten.

Those We Miss

Many were so sorely missed
Many are now sadly missed
Many will someday be missed

How horrible is the one who takes them
How wonderful the one who creates them
How passionate the one who loves them

If they could decide would they decide well?
If I could be in control would I control well?
If you could choose would you choose well?


Many were so joyously living
Many are so amazingly living
Many will be so wondrously be living


Love the life that they will have
Love the life that I will have
Love the life that you will have

Middle of the Night

I love the silence of the night.

At first, the only thing I can hear is silence. It is beautiful. Free of the noises of the day, thoughts can run free in the night. Then, I come to notice the humming of the vent beside my feet. I hear the blinds swaying and rustling from the draft passing by, and the creak of the bed as my sister turns over in her sleep. I wonder about what she is dreaming.

Sitting at my computer, I can hear the sounds of my fingers on the keyboard and the click of my faithful computer mouse. How nice it is to let my fingers channel into written words what I can not usually say. My little dog reminds me of her presence when she sighs a sleepy sigh. It is a gentle sound; it comforts my restless soul. The wind whistles outside, reminding me of how nice and warm this house is.

The chair creaks. I hear a car zoom by. I imagine a scenario that explains the reason for the passengers of the car to be in such a hurry in the middle of the night. I am envious. It would be nice to be able to just drive away and escape like that. I will find somewhere for me to escape to eventually.

I look at the clock. It reads 2:24. Everyone around me is surely asleep. I realize that my leg is asleep as well. How long have I been sitting here? The silence blankets over me once again. I yawn. Perhaps it is time for me to join the others in the world of dreams.

Life's Song

Music is the metaphor for life.

The many harmonies are the different parts of a life that are kept separate but still blend together. Without harmonies, a melody would still sound nice, but it would leave the music feeling empty. Similarly, a life with only one focus will feel unsatisfying.

Dissonance in the music are the points in time when commitments clash, when people fight, and when things are not going the way they are hoped to go. No song is ever completely made of dissonant notes, and eventually those notes are passed.These clashing notes are the parts of the song that make everything else beautiful. When a dissonant pair is passed, anything afterwords sounds like the most awe-inspiring chord ever to have been heard. Just as it is with life, the contrast between bad moments and good moments makes the good moments much more appreciated.

Every part of a musical piece is simply a metaphor for life. Perhaps that is why I am in love with music; I am in love with life.

The Halo Effect

As I was walking up the stairs to my next class today, I was mesmerized for a moment. The light streaming down from the window above me was brighter than I had ever seen. That was not what made me stop walking though. Instead, it was the effect the light made on the other people walking down the stairs. They seemed to be glowing with an unearthly light.

Even though I knew it was simply a trick of the light, I couldn't help but be transfixed. A certain girl stepped into the sunlit spot. She seemed to glow even more than the others. Perhaps the girl was glowing in such a way because she was a sinless and faultless girl. Had a higher power chosen her specially?

The sun ducked behind a cloud and the glow faded. She continued down the stairs, not noticing that she had become an angel for an instant. I began to think again. I had not known the girl, but for an instant I had become sure that she was a perfect being. What were to happen if it had been someone I had known?

If I were to see my friend bathed in that light, the least I would do would be to cherish her a little more. Perhaps I would realize that she is an angel, if only to me. And what if I had seen my most hated enemy seemingly blessed by a higher power? Perhaps I would think a little differently that what I usually saw. Instead of only remembering the reasons why that enemy is so hated, I would think about why she is loved by someone. After all, that light would not shine on someone truly evil.

Perhaps my whole point is that the way light shines on things changes the way they are seen. As with movies, different lighting makes all the difference in what comes to mind. Things I have known my entire life become new again, and things I was once afraid of become the most comforting. Look at the world in a different light.

Fuzzy Friends

Making friends is great. Friends are necessary parts of our lives. Personally, I value my friends more than anyone could ever know. But even knowing this, why is it so easy to lose touch with someone that used to be so much a part of my life? In half a year my closest friends become a distant presence, and when we meet again, it is like having to remake the entire relationship.

The reason I am separated from people is usually because of a school change. Just moving from middle school to different high schools creates a gap between us. Ironically, we still live in the same places we did before, use the same telephone numbers, and still are the same people. Still, no matter how much we want to stay together, our friendship seems to fall apart. Why is it so hard to maintain the relationships you love the most?

What brought this topic up is that recently i met up with a friend that I haven't seen in a few months. Though it was only that short amount of time that I hadn't seen her, somehow we seemed to be mush farther apart then we should have been. Perhaps it was that my mind had been concentrated on other things and had kept me from thinking about her. Perhaps it was that I had made so many new friends. Whatever the reason, the feeling between us when we met was not what it used to be. It seemed as if she was a fuzzy picture of herself when I tried to look at her. I wish we could be the way we used to be.

In the end, my friend and I both pretended that we were the same close pair we always used to be. We ended up having a good time despite the awkwardness that existed between us, and even regained a little of the friendship we had before. I realize now that part of the distance between us was my own fault. I stopped e-mailing as frequently as I had before and I hadn't invited her over even once. This time after we part, I will try much harder to keep us close.

Snow and Metaphors

While watching the blizzard outside yesterday, I could not help thinking about the many things snow has come to mean. The blinding whiteness of the powdery blanket means something different to every person. Likewise, the emotions it can bring to each person vary with every individual.

When I look outside, I see a force that both unites and separates the people around me. It isolates me within my  house, or metaphorically, within my own mind. I can no longer connect with the people I normally see because the blizzard creates a blurring wall of snow that seems to go on forever. Being surrounded by the houses of my close friends and neighbors creates a sense of security, so being cut off reminds me of how alone I really am. Yet, at the same time, the snow unites us. Everyone affected by the storm looks outside and sees the same white wind whipping around. And when the storm is past, we all must help do the same strenuous labor to create a way out of our homes. The feeling of being united is even more prevalent when we all come together to help someone out that cannot make their way out on their own. This blizzard unites and divides us as it blows though our lives.

Snow also creates a sense of tranquility. When the snow is in a calmer state, simply falling from the sky, I feel something different from my daily life. A feeling of calmness and peace washes over me. The snow seems to be so accepting and calm, landing on everything and everyone with the same gentile touch. It covers everything in a blanket of white, making the world seem fragile and new. It makes it seem like the world is not as horrible as it is made out to be. I feel tranquil and at peace knowing that there is hope for this troubled world after all.